An acquaintance from the program stopped me today; a foreign student from an Asian country. It was just the two of us and she asked me, "Can I ask you a question?" Usually when a foreign student asks ME a question, I can tell you it has nothing to do with statistics. More often than not, I am the go to person on American culture, idioms, phrases and grammar. For instance, what does 'to bear witness' mean? Or the advantages of playing a band instrument over an orchestra instrument in American schools; are there more scholarships available for violin players over flute players? Today's question was different.
Do you tell your parents that you love them?
Yes, I do. I tell them when I talk to them on the phone, it is usually how I say goodbye to them. And my sister too! I tell her I love her. And they tell me that they love me too.
She explained that she saw a picture that a child drew for his/her mother and had written on the picture, "I love you SOOOOO much!"
She went on to tell me that for her generation, her country and in her family no one really expresses LOVE. I explained that it is common for families to express love for each other, but for some families and some relationships, it might be more difficult for individuals to express love. But, that in general, it is common for parents and children to tell each other that they love each other. It is also common for husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends to tell each other they love one another. Not to limit love, I even explained that I tell my friends I love them. We chuckled about the differences between love and that love is a versatile word, and really depends upon the relationship and context as to what it means.
Then she told me, I think I'm going to start when I have children and tell them that I love them.
You can imagine I was wildly supportive of this idea and encouraged it. Yeah, and sometimes your kids will make you angry and frustrate you, but you love them anyway! I said as I mimicked a big bear hug.
It is such a good idea! I just think it is good for me to be told that I am loved and to tell people I love them... like, in the movies. I think that is good.
I assured her that it is.
1 comment:
I was sitting in a 12-step meeting recently, and so many people were talking about how their parents never said they loved them, and in some cases, how their parents never hugged them or touched them. I vowed that day never to miss an opportunity to tell (and show) my son and all others that I love them! Thanks for sharing this!
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