Comprehensive Exams

Today I am just angry. Yesterday I got done with my exams and kind of felt relief. Today I got done and just had to go to my vacation office and lie down on top of my old desk-- like a self sacrifice on an academic alter. The only other grad student in the office wasn't at all surprised or take back by my actions. Having gone through the PhD comp experience last year, he viewed my behavior as completely rational. I began to just debrief the test; how bad it seemed, how hard parts of it were, how frustrated I felt. He assured me that everyone feels like they do much worse on the stats part of their test. That is some reassurance I suppose. He also assured me that the worst part is over.

Comprehensive exams are really just a form of hazing. Sure, I could take the academic route and justify them: they require one to become more familiar with the material, they require the student to take a more "comprehensive" look at the material. But personally, I just think it is a form of academic hazing.

Last night when I was up at 3 AM, I vowed to drop the only remaining class I have in which I am required to take tests. It is an elective and I don't need it anyway. Besides, I will probably just sit in on it and enjoy it much more. I was told it would cost $12 to drop the class and I said, It is worth every penny! If I can help it, I will never take another test again. And that makes me happy!

Sure, I still have my take home exam and I will start working on that soon. And I will have oral comps, but that will be better, because I have a better idea of what will be asked. But for now, I am just relaxing, and thinking about all of my friends and family and boyfriend who have encouraged me, sent me care packages, pears, cards, and good thoughts during this time. I am so thankful for all of the support I've received during these past few weeks. I'm thankful.