Beside myself-- and my car

This past week was vacation week.
This is how it was supposed to go:

I was to finish all of my work last Thursday so I wouldn't have to think about it on vacation.
I was going to leave last Saturday for KC to meet up with my sister and we were going to fly to Oregon, one of my favorite vacation destinations.
We were going to spend the week visiting family members, eating fish and chips, watching sunsets and appreciating my hard work from this past year while recuperating and getting revived for the upcoming semester.

This is what happened:
I drove to KC except my car died in Des Moines. I sat on the interstate for about an hour in the 90 degree heat waiting for a tow. I eventually spent 2.5 hrs in a grocery store in Des Moines waiting for my parents to come and get me. We got back to Kansas City after 11:00 PM. My sister and I left the next day for Oregon. Nice things did happen in Oregon, I was able to relax enough to help SOME of my MSDS symptoms to "go into remission." That was good. However, I was also forced to deal with unfinished work (which didn't get done through no fault of my own) and that annoying broken down car in DM. I arranged for a new alternator and battery to be installed. (Cha ching!) Did I also mention that I bought two new tires and had some substantial maintenance done on my car this summer?

This morning, my sister drove me from Missouri to DM to get my car. Slid my credit card through the mechanics cash register and was on my way. Until Williamsburg. That is when my check engine light illuminated. For an issue that really has nothing to do with the alternator or battery, or anything else that I've sunk money into this past summer. Let's just say I am now in a position to decide whether I cut my losses, and at this point, they are substantial losses, or take the chances and fork over a monthly grad student salary for a repair that might not work.

I always thought that if I took care of the car, it would take care of me. I always thought Subarus were workhorses; everyone knows someone who had theirs for over 200,000 miles. Heck, I've known people to buy Subaru with over 100,000 on them because they could get another 100,000 out of it. I was planning to run mine into the ground, or at least make it work for two more years. But evidently, mine is a fluke.

Frustration doesn't even begin to describe this day. I've had a gigantic migrane, my symptoms are elevated, and I am being so hard on myself. One would never suspect I just went on vacation if it weren't for all the dirty clothes on my floor. I called up my sister and could do nothing but cry. We both agreed I should just go to bed.

In the mean time, I fantasize about not having a car. Only using my legs, my bike and the public bus to get me around town. No insurance, no registration, no AAA, NO GASOLINE. It does sound like a nice change. But I'm not okay with that right now. I want my car back. I want it to work for two more years... like it was supposed to.